A recent gem in the St. Paul Pioneer Press chronicled the large number of drunken fans who missed the Minnesota Vikings play the Green Bay Packers this Sunday. Not only did they drop $40 plus on tickets, they missed an epic game, ending with an Adrian Peterson touchdown scamper and a last second missed field goal.
I've witnessed first hand the ills of sports drunkenness and I'm here to steer you away from this disease. It is very important to remember that I am not a doctor, I just consider myself a drinking enthusiast.
Tip 1: Remember that it takes 45 minutes for the average Joe to process alcohol. Remember that beer you shot gunned right before heading through the gates? It is going to hit you right at the start of the second quarter. This could be a good thing if you had an ever so tiny buzz when you polished off that Bud Light, but if you've already had to much to drink you could be heading for disaster in the middle of the game.
Tip 2: Know your limit. This sounds obvious, but a lot of people clearly forget where the line is between having a good time and being so wasted that they won't remember the outcome of the game. Remember that everyone has a different limit. Don't force your friend that is three inches shorter and hasn't eaten anything all day to do four shots with you unless you're willing to help him out of the game.
Tip 3: Make sure you've eaten. A lot. That bowl of cereal this morning ain't going to cut it if you're having a few before a noon game. Go to the game early and eat some protein. Grill some chicken or have some steak and concentrate on having a good time grilling that, rather than just concentrating on taking shots.
Tip 4: Limit yourself to one beer at the game. When I go to a baseball game on a hot summer day, I might leisurely have two beers. At a football game, you're standing and cheering quite a bit - so it isn't super convenient to have a drink in your hand for four quarters. I try to take off just before half time to grab a spot in a short line to get a beer.
Tip 5: Consider drinking after the game instead. This works especially well for dry college stadiums. If you have season tickets, plan on hitting the bars with your friends after each home game that your team wins. Bars and restaurants get crowded with the post-game rush, but this adds to the atmosphere if it isn't overly crowded. The beer is typically less expensive, the selection is better, and you can stand around and re-cap the game with your friends.
Here and there: A number of Ebbets Field Flannels t-shirts are on sale. Despite how amused I am by these, please avoid this or this if you are looking to meet a cute female fan at the game. The coolest NFL hat might be this Bills hat. I think the vast majority of the NFL hats look almost NASCARish.
Distant Replays is offering a series of Ivy League throwback hockey jerseys that will knock your socks off. Know anyone who went to Yale? How about Dartmouth?
